CLEANSING HADES

Every July and August the ancient island filled with a myriad of tourist in search of glamour and abandonment. (It wondered if they knew how she toned down her beauty at this time of year). Her land turned brown and dry and the sky dimmed its blueness in response. Yet the bright light was ever present, always exposing each crevice and wild curve. Everything somehow looked like a fantasy in Mykonos. A trick from the joker above, though many humans thought it was their doing. 

The rock groaned with the added weight, yet held it all with God like strength. The rumble of planes riding across its back. The pounding of music reverberating its cement covered land. Tourists moving along its streets like army ants sensing sweets nearby. Cars screeching, horns beeping in order pass each other in an effort to be first, there always seemed to be a mad rush. 

This is what saddened the island, that odd density that filled the air. A thick energy that felt like Hades was nearby.

Yet the island was clever. Every July and August, the island asked the wind to free her of this heaviness, to clean the air and its people.
And the wind came, as friends do.
To wildly tickle the small trees and fields and make the aegean roar with laughter.
On some days the energy on the island was so thick the wind rushed in with force. A wild whipping that shook the shutters and caused the birds to swerve and curse. Yet all knew it was for the best. 

The island grinned, and dreamt of September.

RESEMBLING LIGHT

Katerina woke, yet kept her eyes closed. She needed to pee. Her sigh held resignation.  She never made it through the night now without needing to pee.  Her eyes opened and she looked towards her front door. She must have fallen asleep in her chair while knitting again. Well, at least it would be easy to get up. Her knees were not what they used to be, years of walking  over cobblestones and mountains had once made her muscles firm, now the bumpy corners of her bones were stiff, swollen and gravely. She thought how she resembled this dry island more with each passing day and smiled at the idea.

The small, dark room still smelled of the herb tea she sipped earlier. An infusion of warm comfort taught to her by her Yaya in this very same house. She inhaled the magic deeply as she leaned forward and with chubby brown fingers braced on the chair’s arms,  pushed herself to standing and moved slowly to the door.

She leaned against the front door and felt the vibration of music, a rhythm that seemed to intensify with each beat, drunken laughter and squeals accompanied the sounds. She lifted the metal latch and opened her door a crack. 

In just that small line of open space her house became a part of the disco just down her little lane, colored spinning lights floated into her living room and upon her chair, her knitting needles twinkled. She remembered opening this door as a child, when the moon was bright and the island was silent. In her girlhood she could hear the moon whisper. 

There was no choice, she would have to step out in her nightgown. Grabbing her shawl tightly in front of her, Katerina stepped out into her narrow lane, quickly maneuvering herself past the night’s partiers. Imagining herself invisible as she opened the next blue door to relieve herself. 

There was a time when this little room down the lane seemed so modern. 

The stones felt the slow rhythm of Katerina’s feet. It had known these feet for many, many years now. Recorded the print of her since the day she was born. It cherished how she once flew through the ally ways and down to the sea on a summers day, her feet slapping hard against warm rocks with a rush of aliveness and roars of laughter. How many nights as a teen had she spent looking up at the sky? Ah, her secret night kisses and embraces. Her grieving goodbyes to loved ones yet open door and arms to strangers. She owned kindness and the island felt humbled to hold her. Yet tonight she felt almost invisible.  The earth and rock comforted itself. Katerina’s essence was forever recorded in the stones and air. Knowing her, she would always be whispering humorous thoughts into the human minds as they lost themselves in the maze of cobbled streets.

Katerina looked quite lovely tonight with her silver hair falling, thought the moon. She was beginning to resemble light. How wonderful. She must be on her way soon. How she would laugh to see Mykonos from here.

HUGE

Operations and chemo had left him weak and had not had the results intended. He was pissed.

As I entered the room to meet him, he sized me up. He took in my messy blond hair half tied in a knot, my colorful dress and my flip flops. Not very business like, but very me. He was polite enough not to roll his eyes yet his expression held great irritation at the thought of sitting through a “breath work” session. I could hear the inner dialogue. “What the hell is breath work anyway? What was the point of all this?” I didn't blame him one bit. I could not deny it, this sucked. 

Call it breath work or rebirth breath work. I have heard all the jokes. “Oh! Will I be RE born? Haha. Will I?” “You want me to breathe for an hour? Oh I don't think I want to do that.” 

It’s part of how we live these days, that makes simply breathing, or openly talking about ourselves feel incredibly awkward. Why would you want to review the ups and downs of your life?  Yet that is exactly what I was about to ask this man to do. 

To open his heart to a stranger. 

I pulled up a chair and he sat on the bed, feet on the floor facing me. Legs crossed, arms crossed and eyes stern in an energy lock down. Slow, concentrated exhales streamed from his nostrils in an attempt to hold his “fed up” in check. 

I began simply by telling him about me and my life. The ups and downs that led me to what I do and how I think. I talked clearly with facts only. This was not a man who wanted to hear about intuitive thinking. I understood. Then I asked about his illness, followed by his job. He was a retired math professor, the keeper of rules, the one you looked to for vindication of your worth. 

I listened to him talk, I heard the monotone stories and the ones that made him offer bored and tired sighs, others that pulled inhales deeper into his being. 

I attempted to mention his breath, and how it was effected by his stories. He shrugged, considering it a possibility.

We went to his childhood, to times of strictness and the learning of life’s book of ‘correctness’ according to man. Life in a New England town. There was an almost invisible change to his eyelids as he mentioned his father, who was once a musician. Admiration and an echo of a child crept into the base of his throat and the tone of his voice owned curiosity and freedom.  

What an honor it is to listen to life stories, to listen to a heart opening, cracking, wrenching, blooming, inspiring… To offer truth and have it returned, even when it doesn't feel pleasant. It holds a sense of energy clearing and true validity beyond good or bad. It’s soul centering.

He awkwardly lied down, shy in his resting pose. Yet brave and polite enough to give it a chance. We added some pillows to prop him up, to try to comfort the constant growing pain in his belly. 

“What will we do now?”

We breathe, inhale followed by an exhale. Simple. Just loose that pause between the two. Create a circle. 

Resistance slowed us, he said. “ This doesn't feel good. I feel odd” 

It can feel that way at first. Focusing on the self, breathing life fully can make you dizzy and scared. 

I thought of an image to help him relax.  I asked him to picture his father’s hands, his fingers as he played trumpet. His inhale caught and his cheeks brightened with a rush of feeling. The rhythm of breath became a circle, joining the universe in its spinning. A current all its own as it connected all life. 

I felt myself drifting into the distance of his awareness, as he felt his father. As he felt everything.

Tears. 

I sat

Quiet.

Watching love. 

Time moved.

After a time he said

“Oh!” 

What is it? How do you feel? 

“I feel, oh. I feel tingly and well, happy. There is no pain at all. I feel no pain just… I am huge. My um energy? It’s huge! Oh wow” More tears.

“Can I stay here a while?” 

Oh Yes. Lets. I put my hand to rest on his shoulder and we hung out in peace.